The mother leaves her husband to go on vacation to teach him a lesson.
Mother on Reddit couldn’t stand her husband’s laziness took an unannounced four-day vacation without him to get some much needed R and Rs and to teach him a lesson. When she asked the online forum if she had done the right thing, they overwhelmingly agreed.
The mother and her husband have been together for eight years and were recently married 15 months ago. They share a four-year-old son. Parents find it difficult to coordinate household chores as she works from home and he is at night until 1 a.m. every day and doesn’t go to bed until 4 a.m.
“It’s a struggle,” she wrote, adding that he “sleeps most of the day until he has to go to work.”
Recently, she noticed that he was doing all he could to get rid of the housework.
“Before that, he would cook dinner on his days off, take care of ALL his son’s needs and do basic housework so I could breathe. Now he doesn’t cook dinner at all, falls asleep. on the couch at 7 so I have a son 24/7 service and I haven’t lifted a finger to clean in weeks. So on my 3 days off a week I end up having to deep clean my whole house because I don’t have time to do anything on my work days other than the bare minimum. “
Two weeks before going on vacation, she reached her limit.
“2 weeks ago I asked him for help. He happily forced himself for 30 minutes before leaving to go help a friend with his car and did not do a jack squat after he returned home. home because he was “tired.” I needed a break. I told him this. His way of comforting me was to hug me and say, “You do such a good job”. I didn’t offer any help or anything. “
His condescension would send anyone on a four-day vacation. So that’s exactly what she did.
“So I made a plan. I asked my mom to take my son for 4 days and I planned a vacation for me with work. I dropped my son off yesterday with my mom (I only did it because my husband obviously works) and I went to our cabin 58 miles away to relax. “
Her husband didn’t understand why she was going on vacation without telling him. But she had let him know that she needed more support for months.
“My husband started texting me last night asking where I was. I told him the booth. He asked where our son was so I told him. He then started to say how that was selfish of me and that if he realized that I wasn’t He just pointed out that he would have helped more. Used the argument that he too is stressed and tired. He claims that my communication about the problem was terrible and could have been more open and exposed. “
Then he had the nerve to say that he could also enjoy a vacation. This guy clearly doesn’t understand what’s going on in his own house.
“[He] say i am a [a**hole] for taking a vacation without him because he “could have enjoyed it too”. But the thing is, I told him right away that I needed a break. I asked him for help. He ignored everything. “
Responses to her sudden vacation were almost 100% positive.
“Doesn’t the husband have eyes? Can’t he see what needs to be cleaned, put away or cooked? Doesn’t he know his child’s needs? woman to clean up after he opens his eyes, “ToTwoTooToo wrote.
“Same with my ex,” Minkiemink wrote. “I told him over and over again. I finally realized that if I had to do it all on my own, I’d rather do it alone with less dishes, less laundry, less mess. I’ve never looked back. “
The post resonated with a lot of people because it is a very common problem. According to Gallup, in heterosexual relationships, women work much harder than men.
“Although women make up almost half of the American workforce, they still shoulder a greater share of household responsibilities,” Gallup said. “Married and married heterosexual couples in the United States continue to divide household chores along largely traditional lines, with the woman in the relationship taking primary responsibility for laundry (58%), cleaning the house (51%) and preparing meals (51%)). “
The reason many men just don’t make the effort to clean is because they assume it’s a woman’s job and that when a man participates he deserves a cookie.
“In many marriages, housework for women is assumed, while men think taking care of their home is optional. real responsibility ”, Rob Pascale and Lou Primavera Ph.D. register Psychology today. “Instead, they often expect what they do to be noticed and commendable, and sometimes a basis for negotiating other goods and services from their wives.”
It’s unclear what happened after the mother returned from her well-deserved four-day vacation, but hopefully she made her point clear. “I need more help,” means exactly that.
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